Estar you must be regretting rite?!?! haha...too bad....... 

steamboat at bee's place..YUm Yum!!! 

taken at Chinatown. i went there during the new year's eve i cant even breathe...smelly armpits everywhere...aargh... 

Breakfast Club clinched the 2nd spot in JamX. WooHoo... 

Its a Sunday and imagine where on earth i'll be........IN SCHOOL!!!!
Projects is killing me....
i fail my IEF, well not surprised so gotta sit for a retest..sigh..
my head's exploding!!! exploding!!! exploding!!!
im upset i cant perform at the coming wednesday at Thumper. .looking forward for it...what can i do?!?
who am i to blame? is it my fault? Is it sch's fault? Whose fault?? Whose fault??

Chinese New Year is aka eat lotsa steamboat!! haha...
cuz im like so old now my angpow's amt also decrease.
too old to visit my relatives also.
had some pix taken at Bee's place..i'llpost it up soon...look out for the hot babes!!! Too bad ur not there Estar..haha...

Oh and check out the UK funfair at woodlands. Cool sia....but pretty ex so be prepared to fork out ur ka chings...

till then...

Have a Happy Merry Chinese NewYear everyone!!!

Abalone, sharksfin, crabs and seafood galore! Heaven...
How am one supposed to NOT eat these wondrous, most glorious food on earth.
Dieting is such a far far far cry away...

I know im half Chinese but traditionally my mum does not celebrate Chinese new year. Why?!? Let me share a bit of my family's history.
Once upon a time there was a malay lad who fell in love with this Chinese girl. After several years of dating (I think if not wrong got more than 12 years!) they decided to get married. However in real life there’s not such thing as fairy tales. Racial discrimination was worse back than and they have to struggle through many emotional obstacles. Especially the fact that a Chinese HAVE to convert into muslim.(the girl’s family ironically owned a PIG farm back then..haha..) Eventually they got married and the girl was sorta disowned by the family aka Parents. They then have 3 distorted-looking children (dun look like malay dun look like Chinese type! Aarghh...) down the years. They've probably seen their grandparents like hmmm max 3 times? And that includes their funeral I guess.

So poor me only go to Mandy's family Chinese new year annually ever since I knew her. Haha. Yes a bit pathetic lah but now I know walter I go to his family's house too. So at least me got a feel of my roots tradition. So hongbaos here I come. Haha.

So here goes my word of advice to those mixed race couple. Do not stop loving each other. The colour of the skin or even religion is just an excuse. Yes I know family is important however your happiness is very important too cuz the decision is what you’ll have to face for life. If you feel that your family is more impt than make the right decision and vice versa. Some sacrifices were of course to be made like hellooo life is not as simple okay! Haha. If both of you can go through this together than there should be nothing you guys cant.

Good luck everyone and talking about luck...Gong Xi Fa Cai...Hongbao Na Lai...haha...

Flight of the Phoenix

Damn slow movie this one. Storyline is a bit dry like the desert they are in. Expect more people to die but got disappointed cuz my motto is the more the survivors were killed the more exciting the show. (remember Final Destination? Haha.)However the show started with a bang and ended quite smoothly. Credit goes to the actors who, under the sweltering, scorching sun can still act convincingly. Kudos to the scriptwriters who keep emphasizing on the human spirit to live and its ability to do everything and anything to survive. (this reminds me, I wanna say a huge Thank You to Silin, Haddad and Wilson for helping me go through the challenges in The Amazing Race 2004. W/o u guys help I dun thing I can even run THAT far and think THAT fast. Mentally and physically exhausting I still move on cuz of u guys encouragement. The 1st prize is the prove to our teamwork. Phew! Haha.)

Overall I give the show 3/5 popcorns. (very forgettable this one.)

Here is the list of movies I’ll be watching. Look out for my review.

-Constantine
-Closer
-A Very Long Engagement

im feeling red and blue all over. Should i laugh or should i cry? Blaw and CMA test r definitely a JOKE cuz i cant do them!! hur-hur..boohoo...35marks gone like the wind just like that. 35 is sooo not my number this year!! Dun say i didnt study for them k cuz i REALLY DID..amazing how a person can feel so depressed and unmotivated back in juz a split second. BS=what a mistake!!

Im going Chinatown later. hope the sight-seeing will help me release some reallly bad energy....

till then....

ONLINE SHOPPING

Being lazy and very busy, its really convenient if i shop online. Currently i only visit Yahoo Auctions and bought some nifty and cheap stuff!! anyone here can recommend any other places where i can get stuff really cheap (esp for acessories, bags, books,vcds). Thanx a bunch!!!

SWEAT

sweat ur hearts out everyone cuz next week is common test week!!! so upset cuz me cant catch Kumar today at Hard Rock. been wanting to see his show!! next time perhaps....

Elektra

Love the gal, HATE the show. Definitely doesnt do justice to Jennifer's acting skills. Storyline is crap. the evil ppl die too easily!! best part of the show is when i saw Jen (wah call her by first name liao..haha!) kissing this evil bitch. Now thats HOT!! haha...i gave this show 2/5 popcorns...even Jen cant save it!! sigh.....

me helped me grams prepare this kind of malay kueh which have like sweet coconut fillings. its really-really good!!! took us 2 hrs to finished steaming the whole thing and now i cant stop eating it! haha...its for hari raya haji!!! 

yummy!! 

the banner at the National Park outside the Istana. Got an ugly pic of me with the band for all to see at Orchrd. Farking embarrasing lah....however its kinda nice to see our name there. So am i supposed to feel like Linkin Park now?!? haha... 

WHERE THE FARK IS EVERYONE?!?! it was raining very heavily so no one actually saw us perform.no one bothered. Crazy ah who wanna stand in the rain?!?! kinda waste our time lah so treat it like an experience......... 

Pix taken from the NTU competition. it was dark lah that day so this is the best quality pic i've seen(cuz the ones walter too sux lah..haha).this was posted in some website so i took it down!!

yup change back to this skin....lazy lah to find other skins for the time being i'll stick to this....

me went to judge the ICT Idol juz know. some of them are pretty bad. one is so terrible that the moment he starts singing i started giggling uncontrollably!!! haha...he sounded like donald duck wannabe lah!!! haha....i know its rude but i cant help myself so i covered myself with the paper like the american idol judges did. YES HE"S REALLY REALLY BAD!!! the rest are too mediorce...oh this is to estar and sarah, Morris was there too...haha...he auditioned as usual lah...im too tired to comment abt him liao! haha...if u guys know what i meant...

IEFarker can suck my cork!! if i have one!! haha...im denied of my beauty sleep cuz of that subject....

this sunday is JamX. i'll be at the Youth Park. If ya guys wanna see me can juz drop by there..oh and remember to bring banners and poms-poms ya!! hhaha...just kidding lah im not good lah. just trying our luck cuz the top three band will be liasing with Lime mag. which also means that the bands will perform at their every functions and parties. bloody cool huh!!!!

all the best to me band! hehe...

Habbo Hotel

its this really cool place where we can hang out in virtual world and meet lotsa pple in diff countries! Check it out peeps and tell me ya nick...whenever im there i'll find ya! hehe...

To Cheryl: Really!!! aaargh....well so u still outsourcing other places?! Me too busy to outsource liao....lets sing,"Que sera sera...whatever will be will be...the truth is not ours to see...que sera sera...what will be will be...."

To Estar: Nope no way im removing that emo picture...haha...unless of course you name me a price....dun mess with me darling i have many-many pix of u looking far worse!!! hahaha......

To Rae: Yup Ms Koh is FUN!!! But being fun and sometimes dun understand what she's talking about is another problem...haha...IEF is tough honey!! Ooh me read about ur post about the white dragon thingy...scary manz....wonder how they can read the future! shivers......

Old Bitch

Went to Koh Poh Tee's tutorial just now. Initially me wanted to skip it but WTF me changed me mind. But im gonna say this and i think many will kill me or disagree strongly. Whatever it is, after this lesson, i feel like i actually like that old bitch!! haha...she's sorta sarcastic in a very lame way. her jokes may be lame-y and crappy to pple but i think it actually works for me. It'll actually help me remember the stuff she said! haha...yup lame jokes penetrate my brains easier!! wonder why..............................

anyways though i dun really love International Economic i think it has really interesting eccentric/menopausing/unmarried tutors. rather than those boring one i.e CMA i.e Mr Ng Lai Soen!!!
u know, in the back of my heard i do wonder sometimes whether i'll grow old this way. *winced* Single/menopousy/bitchy/eccentric...bleurgh....i know estar will if he still dun get himself attached! haha kidding lah k no pressures dude!

To think of it...life will be so perfect if i can bitch the whole day and no one can stop me!!

a very bored me took this pic in my room. Just anyhow snap but still it looks pretty good huh....the light thingy at the back is my lamp!! haha...im borrowing the book "Photography for Dummies" soon...who knows one day i might make a living being a photographer?!?! hahaha.... 

After dinner we went photo-taking with my new camera. haha....this pix taken in front of a supa-dupa huge christmas tree!!! 

Candlelight dinner at Meridien Hotel during Christmas. Though waayyy expensivo but dearest still paid for it!!! this is my most romantic dinner EVER!!! 

Estar and me at Partyworld after the competition. Its sort of and after-celebration thingy and im still feeling very "high" so we met up with Mandy and sang our hearts out!!! 

Me and Ross in Rouge at Overdrive the competition. We won third place! WOOOHOOO.... 

First and Formost...

HAPPY BELATED CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!!
soooo sorry me never wish ya darlings earlier! Me been pretty busy to update....I LURVE u guys forever and ever!!!!

so life's so far:

-still coping with sch. made myself a pact that i'll study as hard as i can....cuz i really-really wanna go to Marketing...i'll prove to the sch that im not a slacker!! though my class attendence thing is getting worse...i cant wake up early enuf thus have to skip classes!!!! aaargh...

-had a very nice christmas. went to a nice dinner and enjoyed myself thoroughly! got and digicam for a gift and feeling pretty guilty i didnt get him anything...oh and i've taken some pics which i'll post up...haha me very mountain tortoise one....

-Celebrated New Year with my bestest buds and greatest love! Went to Sentosa...dance halfway thru the night then stop cuz i dun have the energy and feeling pretty bored. Haha...u guys shld know im not the party people type! Actually reluctant to go but since the esplanade activities was cancelled at the evry last min. so half the party time i spent slacking away at the beach and people watch till 6 plus in the morning. yeah mandy im really sorry i did not dance with u cuz i COULD not dance anymore. haha.....well overall it was a somehow great start for the new year and im actually looking forward whats in store in this new year.

Have a great one everyone! ;o)

BUSY BEE....

ok im very very busy nowadays i can hardly breathe normal.
Life so far:

1) NTU competition. YESSS!!! we got into the finals. though none of us will expect any wins cuz other bands are like damn damn damn good kind. so we're juz gonna "whack" and have fun. We'll rawk!!!! ooohhh....we'll be performing at Rouge lah so kinda cool. Heng not hard rock ah! haha....anyone interested tix can be bought at the door. $12 gets one standard drink and entree....

2) Breakfast Club will also perform on the 31st at two places but im not sure where...haha...also on the 2nd Jan at the ISTANA!!! OMG OMG OMG!!! we wun be playing to the PResident lah of course but what the heck...so im busy shuttling to the studio now after sch and back. me throat's really sore........

oh shucks look at the time!!! okok im late for my prac...gotta go...update again later.....

What a great weekend

Me spent the entire weekend with me darling. Me now feeling like i had a hangover of love...haha... on Sat we went to have sushi at Sakae at Suntec. Apparently dearie got a friend who works there so we got major discount! haha. He cleared like 80% of the plates we consumed. Well hope he dun get caught!

afterwards we went to have this summit tour on top of one of the suntec city building. though only 45 stories up, i felt like on top of the world!!! singapore looked so tiny and so many skyscrapers. Me can even see Igors there...haha...but ts like soo romantic..windy...cooling...u know like so great for making....ahem....Wasted there's another couple with us...if not...ahem....hehe...well im not too adventurous anyways.....haha....

then we went to the esplanade. there was this "mat-rocker" band. so many malays were there....oh there's a time me and dearie went to eat fondue at the esplanade's Haagan Dasz. Nice!! though a bit steep on the pricing...cost $30 for the both of us...but highly recommended. Yummy.....i love haagan dasz.....

we were supposed to watch Bridget Jones but Eng Wah at amk dun screen that show anymore..WTF...so we decided to have some wine (which i really hate but no choice but to drink cuz he's always winning...aaarghh...) and have an "early night".....hehe....

me dun know what i'll be giving him this christmas. sucks that im bloody broke. He told me he's gonna say 100 "i love you" as my present. i told him to tape it down. haha....Damn i love that man sooo bloody much.....
what have i done?!....

IEF is an OMG module. I wonder how my ex-classmates survived and passed this module!? the tutors are such sadistic creatures. every ounce of "things" coming from their mouth is pure filth and depreceating humor. No...im not gonna let them contaminate my brain....no...no...no...not this time...one mrs poore is enuf in this world!!

Tmw i'll be attending rock class. i hope it'll be as interesting as drama....oh talking about that i'll be visiting estar's drama class...so guess i'll get to see mr D again huh...after that its off to meet mandy and her beau to a lunch buffet thingy....arrghhh....me diet is crashing man!!!!!

The Breakfast Club at PowerJam04

Yup this is my band. we play mostly funk, rock n roll, soul and top 40s.

a new singer juz joined our band. its a close friend of theirs. She has very fantastic strong vocals. We performed yesterday for this thingy and she rawks with her version of 'Chain of Fools'. I felt like a fool singing next to her. sigh...i know my voice needs lots of vocal training to reach her standard. she can reach all the high notes while i sing back up...honestly i dun mind singinging back up but what will pple say? "oh u have two singers but only one can make it?".....u guys know whats the funny part? she said that SHE was the one who feel very paiseh singing next to me. apparently i have a "sultry" voice....YEAH RITE!!! im not the one with the diva voice...aargh....very sian feel like quitting....i know they need me for my songs..is that what im only worth as? should i quit before its too late?....

Jalan Raya A.K.A go pple house, eat pple kuih and take pple $$

Honestly im not very fond of jalan raya...cuz the whole time u have to act as if ur very happy and smile until me cheeks hurt! haha...so there's like a few of my grandma's family who came over her house these few days..malay got this weird custom its like as long as u are working u have to give out green packets. It's bad enough i look damn old for my age so all these kids all come and salam (u know the peck on the hand thingy) me and waiting for me to give them packets...HELLOOO!! Its like im NOT THAT OLD ok! so there i was having to explain all the time that im still schooling and shit..then they go "oh...u look soo old.." ...mother fuckers... #%@ #%*#! embarrased like hell....

NEW YORK, NEW YORK!!!

Since i've acclaimed the knowledge to post pics i shall divulge u guys with part of my dream....

my dream and goal this moment is to travel and live abroad...go to diff places in diff countries and live there in prob a year or two...i know myself well, im that type who cant stay put in one place too long e.g spore cuz i'll go bonkers!!!! this month i've put in some rather serious thinking abt what i wanna do with this rather short, pathetic life of mine...thats why i decided to put myself in this kind of weird test and adventure and i hope i can start them within 5 years. i wanna meet diff kinds of pple and their cultures....to start off, i wanna go to NEW YORK! and also visit the famous Central Park!

entrance of dream home...

i feel that apartments in NY have "characters". Meaning they have lotsa depth, history and all...very "old-school" lah in simple terms.

Fireplace

i'll prob get a one room bedroom and maybe work my ass off as a waitress...hehe...yeah i know i wanna be a waitress in NY! There's soo much hype in it...haha...ok anyway...i want my lil room to have a cosy fireplace. yup so i can read me books and chill at me cosy apartment! haha......life will be simple but perfect!!!

Room With a View

it'll darn darn darn heavenly if my apartment overlooks the city skyline and/or the brooklyn bridge!!!

Introducing Central Park!!!

i got to know this place from the show FRIENDS....haha...its damn huge...its like botanical gardens time 100...haha....

central park during Fall

Breathtakingly beautiful....i can have a stroll here forever! haha....

horse carriage

imagine sitting in this horse carriage around the park...feels like a princess! haha...the park do have some historcal landmarks, very famous pple immortalized by statues....stuff like that....ooohhh and the gardens have like strawberries and stuff...very breathtaking and beautiful...definitely better than the botanical gardens....

snow gliding

you dun have to go to switzerland to do this...haha....imagine rite at ur doorstep!! yay!!!

Skating Rink...

the things i love about NY is that it embraces the 4 seasons....especially during the winter...i personally have not experience YET snow but im very exhilirated to do so...but i've done skating before at Jurong...haha does it count?! Anyways i dun mind falling onto the arms of a handsome man here...it'll very romantic especially in this atmosphere..hehe..erm..that is if im single lah...ahem....

Rock VS RnB SHOWDOWN!!!!

And then there was two.
At this point of time its undeniably obvious sylvester is still around cuz of his fans. His legions of fans vote more when he pout and wink, cry and vote even more when he kena slammed by judges cuz of his bad performance. Hiya let him have the title already lah. this point of time im already sick and tired of overzealous, blind, deaf singaporean teenagers. Whatever.

The one i pity most now is Taufik. He may not be a great singer but he's good enuf. Good enuf to represent singapore. pity he may not have as many fans as sylvester or else he may have a chance to win this. I know u pple think i come here slam my opinions, say who's good who's bad but still never vote! i think the voting thingy is lame lah. Honestly! However last week i cast 3 votes for taufik and 1 for olinda. haha...yeah waste me 50 cents cuz olinda went out! haha...i succumb cuz i really dun want that cheena guy to pass thru. sianz...

am i gonna vot for the final? maybe not...cuz eventually, i believe both of them will still get those sought after music contracts. in a few months time the first idol fever will subside and then the second one will take over. By then...............
Watch out for me!!!! hahahahaha.....................................

ok peeps im back..and very much alive thank you very much!]

after hibernating myself for a whole month, i guess its time i resurface and make a comeback to blogdom. haha like as if im ttthhhhaaattt important huh! haha...so tell me..did ya guys miiisssssssss me? tell me lah no need shy! tell me........

a brief summary of my holiday so far......

1. read many many books....read mags....novels....romance....thrillers...more than my fingers can count!

2. borrowed stacks of vcds.....to make sure time pass by really fast.....then if there is no more vcds to watch i'll go catch a movie!!

3. did cross stiching....still haven done up nicely yet...still got bits and pieces hope i finish by start of term...

4. sleep like a king! 12 hrs a day!! from 5am to 5 pm.....everyday....haha...

5. learn guitar basics....but still not pro yet! when?!?!......................

6. catch up on Days of our Lives!!! my life will be considered as super normal compared to Days!!!

7. did some soul searching and goal setting....

8. managed to go to the zoo!!! yay!!!

9. slack and slack and slack somemore!!!! hahaha.....

yup thats about what i did the entire month!!! really i never bluff! got my rest finally and my brain is charged and rearing to go!!

yeah rite......haha...........i think im addicted to this lifestyle!

SLACKERS UNITE!!! hehe....

WHAT DO U WANNA BE???....

Ever wonder what u wanna be when u grow up?

For me i never really thought about it. Especially when im in primary sch. However i still remember i wanna be a wedding gown designer. Yes it silly of me i know! I can remember clearly that when i was in pri 3 or 4, i bought this drawing book to sch and then start drawing my "creations" down. Yes i love to draw! Not nature stuff nor abstract stuff but i have a fetish of drawing people. haha....i love to draw people expressions....face...eyes....hair...lips...but i hate drawing the nose cuz i suck at it!! haha....ok back to the topic...so i start to have these wedding gown collections and showed them to my best friend then. Nope not u Estar..haha..its Adlin...haha she told me she always wanted to be a designer too if im not wrong...so there i was in my class when im like supposed to be studying im drawing..haha...i lost the book unfortch...hope it doesnt fall into the wrong hands...quite embarrassing actually!!!

Then when i reached pri 6 to sec 1, i wanted to be a rock star! yes i always love music and i wanna be a star!! i wanna be as famous as the spice girls!! haha yes its their influence lah...then me and bee always thought and wished that one day we'll be big! very big together. we'll form a girlband and stuff. we were singing everyday...play songs as loud as we can and mimic the dance moves and stuff!! i remembered us doing a demo together. and send it to sony...haha... Fun times....those were the days i missed...there was no stress...i was dreaming everyday...sigh...miss those days...

then when i was in Sec 3 onwards i wished i was actress..haha..yes theatre plays will do...remembered the drama and numerous skits and hosting we did estar in sch? i was sooo sure i was ready to make it in the entertainment industry!! Our sch musical i was also involved...great experience acting and singing in the Victoris Theatre to thousands of people!! I was hooked!!!!! i love the lights the glamour and the star treatment!!! haha...i love being able to express out a character that was never me...but i guess i'll never make it now...that im in BS it is sucking out my creative juice in me...i remember i used to be soo bubbly and joking all the time but slowly its sapping me out!! education is totally bringing me down!!!

thats why i wanted soo muh to join mass comm...however due to the lack of "ooomphh" in my command of the English language i was kicked in my gut twice. oh well guess its not meant to be....

Whats my ambition now? hmmm...i still wanna be a rock star and be in the entertainment industry. Alas i dun have the looks nor the body the mass is looking for so im putting those dreams aside....thats why i join a band...its to appease the music spirits in me...now im just glad if i'll be able to work in the entertainment industry...probably in fashion or music...major in marketing or advertising or something. creative things....im creatively-challenged..im not super creative but im pushing myself to be..hopefully one day i'll be able to work in new york and get my dream apartment....in the meantime i'll just see how life is gonna bring me....

so...what do you wanna be when u grow up?!?

EXAMS SO FAR

sorry guys me now suffering from some chronic hand fatigue so hard lah type...so im not gonna do my usual essay type blog. here's how my papers so far...

HRM- quite easy..craps alot...i think this is a waste time subject...

Micro- hard like shit..those bitches obviously wants us to fail again...aiyah dun care lah see how the results first....

oklah thats all i can master...very sleepy lah yest sleep only 2 hrs study micro...SOOO not worth it sia...aaargghhhh!!!!

I need a hug!!

More sad/depressing quotes...enjoy...

-Life doesnt want me death doesnt either I wish there was just an in between, something that was easier.

-Everyday i wake up, I cry a little more. Everyday i wake up, and i die a little more

-Death is the punch line of a bad joke called life. Once it comes you are so happy for it to finally be over

-Depression too often walks hand in hand with a deep sense of helplessness.

-The Person To Dry Your Tears Is The Person Who Made You Cry

-Society offen forgives the criminal but never the dreamer

-SO OFTEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR TRYING TO FIND SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL ... BUT ALL I SEE IS ME

-Life had one simplistic fate, every1 was born 2 die, so y the hell is it so complicated???

-Time Doesnt Heal Anything!!!!

-Why is it 'goodbye' has the word good in it, when it never is?

-Suicide is just a cry for help that nobody saw

-If suicide is selfish then why do you think we do it?

-Pain is beauty

-You loved me when i didn't loved myself

-It's amazing to me how I can be surrounded by a ton of people and still feel completely alone

yeah thats all for now.....next time i free i'll find and post more!...

MOTIVATIONLESS (does this word even exists?!?)

i have no urgency or motivation to study at all. im dead and i dun care. U people can bitch behind my back for all i care. estar i think i might repeat the whole semester with u next year! haha...well at least got friend to suffer with! haha....

DISCO NIGHT

Dear fairy godmother. will u do a kind deed by *poofing* all the S'pore Idol contestants to never-never land. (more like never-never sing again land!!) Probably back to the disco era where they can ALL start to learn how to dance AND for gods sake SING!?! Or u can conguer up a new island called "I Love Jerry" and he can be the President and then ship all his fans and his church and the rest of the idols to that island too!!! This is for the good of mankind as these people are a danger to the society!
Thank You and have fun! (oh btw, remember to bring ur ear-muffs..it'll be helpful! Oh and make sure they dun come back...if there's still space u can take the judges and producers too! So there wun be any repeats in S'pore Idol 2..if there will ever be one... ) =P

some few sad/depressing quotes i've found online:

-Lifes Like A Candle So Bright And Strong At That Start But Then Slowly Begins To Die Out

-My aspiration in life is death.

-Why is it that the people you love hurt you the most?

-Behind this disguise, my life has unhearingly spokenThat my life is hopeless, and my thoughts are broken

-Often suicidals dont want to die, not in the split second we do it, we want other people to see the physical pain we go through because of the mental pain they inflicted on us before we do die.

-I carved your name in to a bullet so you'd be the last thing going through my head. (wah this one a bit extreme ah! haha...)

-I don't envy I just wish

-Just wish i was anywhere but here

-If you love me then you'll die for me.I love you so im dead.

-A break up is like a broken mirror its better to leave it broken then hurting yourself trying to fix it

-Within my soul im flooded with the red sea for my heart bleeds tears.

ok these are only a few nice ones...i'll try to find more...

THE THING CALLED LOVE

"The Greatest Thing You'll Ever Learn Is Just To Love And Be Loved In Return" quoted from the movie Moulin Rouge.

Inspired by estar's lyrics, i decided to contribute on my ideas on LURVE!! Mine will be more on BGR love than family love. Cuz im more familiarize in this. I dun understand much about family love cuz my family is not around all the time anyways so i dun give a hoot about this genre.

Being i love and in a relationship is wonderful. Meeting walter is the next best thing that has ever happened to me. I never felt so much care and wantedness (is there even this word?!?) in my live. I felt secure and was provided with the best treatments like hugs and kisses. Especially when im feeling really upset or happy! Its not that friends are not good enough, the feeling is different. My freinds will always be there for me i know them. But being with ur other half, sharing so much intimately feels like im in heaven. hehe...

Once in my life, i was afraid. I was so afraid to put myself in a relationship that i rejected so many guys who were wooing me (not that they are suitable anyway...most are jerks..) Im not the despo type ok! but my dear fren mandy helped me thru this. thanx babe...ur advice on relationships helped as ur more exerienced than me...hehe...she told me to give love a chance. to open up. to receive whats mine.

I did. and thats how walter and me got together. i was very very sceptical at first because i known him for like only 2 months. im like so young lor! But we feel so right for each other. We complement each other. i felt it to so i decided to give in. we are together for almost 3 years now and going strong. our future together is bright. hehe...

to estar and many u-think-ur-lonely soul out there. Dun look for love. love will find you. dun rush it and if it comes dun feel scared about it. embrace it with open arms. to some of you, it will happen today or tommorow, for others it might be many many years later. i know how it feels to be "alone". But ur not alone actually. You still have frenz and families to go to when there's problems.

Being in a relationship is not all rainbows and sunshine either. its also about risks and responsibilities. Many break up because they eventually feel they are not suitable with each other. thats why i recommend that dun just go steady with people blindly cuz u wanna me in a relaionship. breaking up sucks like hell trust me!!! ooh and dun repeat ur mistakes.

ok thats all from me. im no aunt aggie k! haha craps!
Happy searching guys!
Good Luck! =)

Yes i've decided to change my blogskin to a less complicated one...though i still love my screaming priness, its time to let her go!! haha...well honestly im getting bored with her. Its time for a change!!!
Im using my first blogskin. I think this skin is perfect. Its neat and its in two of my fav colours! HOW PERFECT! haha...

oklah gtg me gotta study liao...HRM this Sat and im freaking out!

Zan OUT!

THE SIMPLE THINGS

Thanks estar for your support yesterday! Thanks again for the banner u made yesterday.
Though we may not get in, im really glad u came to support. At least I was not alone when I screwed up!

Talking about that, I made a major blunder. I was like forgot when im supposed to come in so I missed 2 whole bloody verse and dunno when to come in for chorus. Then afterwards my mood like totally went out. So the second song aka Fact or Fiction Breakfast Club da remix was totally bland blah blah boring. My energy went out cuz of disappointment and after seeing Joe's face. Nobody could hear my voice in the second song and at the end it went out of tune. How great right?! So I guess we didn't get in then.(still haven check. Nobody bothers as everyone thought we are so axed! Haha.) Im totally cool if we didn't got in but im feeling like super duper guilty cuz of my lack of effort put in. I know I can do better (like this wed performance in the American sch. That was a great performance!) but I didn’t so im like feeling soo pissed off. Nvm there’s still more gigs and competition to look forward to.

Yesterday me went to the Lime party at cineleisure. Went there to check out Soul’d Out’s performance and see Singapore idols. Soul’d Out sooooooo totally rawks!!! The Singapore idols should come check the singer out! Her voice power! When will my band ever reach that standard?! Haha. But I know for certain that my voice can never ever reach as high as her. Like I told my band members. You cant make norah jones be Christina Aquilera. Soo not possible. If my band want a sexy diva, they can jolly well find someone else!
I was quite disappointed cuz Jeassea was not there with the other idols. Jerry got soo much booing and thumbs down yesterday! Haha he deserves it lah. Why dun he just VOLUNTARILY drop out of the competition? Waste of time and effort. But i gotta salute him for his thick skin!!!

Oklah enough of my craps. Cheerios!!!!

Muggers

Im definitely not one of them. these muggers study like mad for exams. im not and im wondering why though. Hmmm...yeah im an anti-mugger aka Lazy bum bum...haha...me skipped all me classes this week...been feeling exhausted all the time. PMS ah! haha...my tutors are extremely worried about me. everytime ask me call them and talk. Ok fine i have depression but i dun have to talk to you losers? What can i talk about??? U people will tell me to study hard, education impt..blah blah blah...those shit i know ok u all dun have to remind me!! I've decided, to complete sch at my own sweet time. Yes even if it takes 3 1/2 years or even 4 years! i know people will gossip about me or talk behind my back. But seriously i dun give a damn. It my own bloody life so piss off gossip mongers!!!!

Singapore Idol

the are the losers for spore idol last night. The "winners" are JERRY ONG, David Yeo, ok...basically all lah except leandra and Olinda. haha...these 2 performance are ok only lah at least not wince-worthy! MAy singapore BAN these contestants from dancing. EVER.

Singapore American School

Man this sch rawks! seriously! haha..better than NP of course. The students are cute like hell! the wed my band played there. To estar: The girls are hot! Too bad u didnt come! haha...our performance are definitely better than the mooncake festival thingy! we became more confident and the audiences are bobbing their heads and dancing and we also got a loud applause. so it feels good! haha hard work paid off!!! after that many ang mohs came to us and said Good Job! yay!
im more confident now for this sat auditions. Its the power 98 PowerJam competition and if we got it we'll be competing in the semi finals. The finals will be held at Zouk! Damn cool ah i soooo wanna win. But i dun think we're that good yet lah so we're just giving a shot! We are concentrating more on JamX the competition. so wish me many many luck guys!!

Woohoo our school band Soul'd Out won the Battle of the Bands!!! the're also performing this sat i think for the lime party!! our mentors...haha...

BIRTHDAYS BAHs!!!!

This is dedicated to estarino.

Hey trust me i know how u felt especially about your birthday. I never really had a birthday bash before. Neither have i ever had cake (last time i remembered it was during secondary 0ne) Nobody bothered buying me a cake. (other than u 2 years ago. which i must say, i really really really appreciate it though i didnt get to eat it, it must be very very nice!) Everyone is always busy during my birthday. I had a pretty good birthday this year when my class gave me gifts and a card. Quite shocking actually. I know what u meant when u said about the presents. i dun have a lot of presents too actually. I always always envy people who always have GREAT birthdays evry year. (one such example is Mandy. Always lurve her parties!) My parents forgot about my birthday all the time. haha. i never received any gifts from them before. (not like i care...) So my overall 19 birthdays of my life is pretty much blah blah blah boring!

thats why i always go for simple dinners with my good frenz. Nothing ever go wrong with dinners. remember u made me a mike! hehe..that year we went eat steamboat! yeah i remember that! (and that stupid britney spears movie which sux sux sux!! haha...) estar be happy that your frenz are with you with your birthday. what happens during it doesnt matter. it is you birthday u should make up the best of it. next time, let me and bee do your birthday! haha...

im cynical. I always think that people give presents so that they expect people to give them too during their birthday. Then its not sincere right? what happened to pure "i wish u a happy birthday and here's a present to commemorate this day and i hope u like it"?!? what different value is there between a gift and well wishers? i believe as long as people REMEMBERS your birthday and wish you well you should be grateful. I dunno which idiot came up with birthday presents. What is the point of presents? U mean the more the value and amount of presents we get means the less useless we are in this world? hmm....

people may say that cuz i dun have much frenz and i dun get presents and i say all this cuz im just trying to console myself can jolly well fark theselves. i know better cuz i have experienced the best of both world. plastics fake people exists around us. whatever i dun need "i pity you" gifts too..i want i cant buy myself!

to conclude, its the wrong way to be angry during your birthday estar. I mean, you ARE getting a year older. If i were you i'll be angry with THAT!!!

I WASN'T BORN WITH ENOUGH MIDDLE FINGERS

First a shout out to ASStarino oops I mean EStarino. “Happy Birthday to YOU!” Oh.. me feels like singing a song! A birthday song to you. Here goes..”Happy Birthday to you. You are born in the zoo. The Monkeys and Donkeys. All fall in Lurve with you!!!” haha..i think it goes something like that lah. Oh did I mention this birthday boy present is an attachment to the Singapore Zoological Gardens?! So what a perfect song. Hahahaha! Wasted ah I never go to your barbeque. Oh well, if not for the case of two VIP (Very Irritating People!) I’ll definitely go. Talking about presents, I haven got you one. Haha. Like DUH huh. Well you know I know im broke so there goes. Haha.. Guess I owe you one.

Beverly and Jessea got kicked out from spore idols yesterday. Aarghh...no motivation to watch the show liao. haha. Seriously what the fuck!!!!!

White Chicks
This show is hilarious! i love Bitch Fits aka B.F. now i know what to name my seriously PMS-y tantrums. Bitch Fits! I especially like the part where the black guy trying to woo the cop guy! haha...he is soo...Chauvinistic Pig! haha....this show is a must watch if ur suffering from pre-exams stress! me give them 3.5/5 popcorns!!!